Today was a hard day… But at the same time inspiring and “enlightening” one. It’s been a little bit over a month since I’ve picked my 5 travel cases and moved all the way to another continent, to a country and city that I have never visited before and knew very little about. After a month of constant sun shining and warm weather, today was the first chilly and rainy day in LA. To be honest, it’s been pouring outside and I’m glad that I had that luxury of choice to stay inside and just “be” at home.
To be… Sometimes I just forget to be. Be in the moment, be present, acknowledge the people around me… Even more I forget to live a little, not take everything so seriously and just let myself breathe. I can’t lie and just portray you lovely pictures and stories from LA and not tell you the other side. The side where I’ve been running myself to the edge of stressing too much, too often sweating the small stuff and putting the expectation (of myself ) bar too high!
Somehow I got overwhelmed with the feeling that if I don’t do exactly as much as I have planned and in a timeframe that I’ve charted on my invisible schedule map, that I’m a loser or not capable of being a good mom, good wife, etc. Big – fat – mistake! It’s ok to let loose, to just sometimes, go with the flow and let some things in life just play out by themselves.
Another crucial thing that I forget to do is to “high-five” myself for everything I’ve done, everything I HAVE accomplished and how far I’ve come from let’s say Natali a year ago. It’s easy to loose sight of how much I’ve done and how, once in my past or even back in my childhood, I could never even dream of the moment that I’m living in right now to be my reality.
I’m a big perfectionist, my own worst critic and a huge dreamer, so put all of these together and imagine the “party time” in my head and soul that I face every morning when I wake up and every night when I lay down to sleep. I hope that in future before I lay my head on the pillow at night or open my eyes in the morning, I’ll remember to count my blessings, expect less but always, always dream of more! After all I want to leave a mark in this world, I want to know that besides my flesh and blood ( my daughter ) I am one day going to leave a heritage behind me that she’s be proud of and I’m not talking about dollars here… 🙂
Have a fabulous day my sweet readers AND THANK YOU! for always being so kind, supportive, for commenting and just sharing love because it means the world to me!
I’m wearing: Dress – Ganni, Bag – Balenciaga, Jacket – Zara, Bracelet – Givenchy, Shoes – Vagabond