Me too… I’m also a victim of domestic abuse, sexual harassment and mental torture. If you’ve seen any news in the past week or so, you must have come across the #metoo and have read a line or two regarding one of the biggest Hollywood scandals since Johnny Depp’s abuse of Amber Heard. Those news broke like a wildfire and each day, more and more women have decided to speak up and open up about something that’s unfortunately so common and have been for years, decades, centuries even “hidden” and not talked about as it was such a SHAME to be a victim of any kind of abuse… As if it would have been victim’s fault for being abused.
Me too… I have for all those years of my life just been silent, hiding my abuse, from the domestic one where I’ve had my head smashed against the wall, hit on the ground and beaten like an animal, to the sexual harassment in form of harsh remarks made about my looks or whatnot by random showinist strangers at my Summer jobs or bar nights out to the mental torture of those “in bigger power” than myself and making me feel so uncomfortable in my own skin that I have developed a serious case of anxiety, followed by a deep depression and finally to picking myself into pieces by shit talking to myself and hating myself… I felt like a speck of dust and a boxing bag at the same time… Invisible yet visible enough to use me as the target to release all of the unhappiness and uncomplishments of others on myself. Yes, me too…
The only “fault” I accept to be put on my account is the fact that I haven’t put a stop to any of this abuse any time sooner. My fault is that I haven’t learned to stand up and speak up for myself earlier than only now, when I’ve turned 30.
I won’t go into many details as it might be too revealing by whom and how I’ve been molested but I am happy and proud of myself that I have come to terms of what has happened to me, I have accepted it and I’m not letting my past and those horrible nightmares have power over me anymore. I’m not letting my molesters ever rule my right on happiness and the quality of life… I’m choosing a whole new approach to the next 30 years of my life. I’ll make them the most beautiful and self-loving years, the ones where I’m standing up for myself and for all those who would love to speak up but can’t because they’re too, either being ashamed, insecure or silenced down…
#metoo shouldn’t happen to anyone, but it does and unfortunately I know that it will keep on going in the future too but the more we speak up about everything that’s wrong in our society the less power those monsters will have to ruin something as sacred, innocent and beautiful as somebody’s pure soul and good heart. Don’t let others rule your world, KICK THEM in the ass by showing them that you too have teeth and strength to fight back! Fight for yourself, you are your best friend, you are going to live with yourself for the rest of your life each day, each second… Don’t live in the darkness and suffer alone because you’re not alone and together we’re all stronger to build a better world for our children (and future generations) to live in!
This blog post is my release from the inner prison, this is present to myself for my 30th birthday.
Happy birthday to me!
25 Comments
I’m so sorry you had to go through what you did. Thank you for sharing this, and thank you for being brave!
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Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
you are so amasing..beautiful too……..
Fotazassssss, madre mía parece sacado de un cuento. Preciosa.
Te dejo mi último post
https://simplysory.wordpress.com/2017/10/19/station/
That pics are so amazing! Kisses
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First of all, these photos are ridiculously gorgeous and somehow go well with the story, you look so strong – nothing can stop you now.❤️ But darling, reading your story is soul-shattering – I am beyond sorry for what you’ve had to go through. I have no words really, would just want to give you a hug right now! And also, often the most wounded ones of us have the kindest hearts – and that’s exactly what makes you the amazing you that you are today!
So happy 30th birthday, excited to be a part of your next 30 years – let’s focus on loving ourselves, that’s the only way hey!
feliz cumpleaños linda, espero que nunca más nadie quiero abusar de ti en ningun sentido y que cada día tengas más fuerza para seguir adelante porque lo que haces es de una persona muy valiente.
un beso y que estos 30 que siguen sean maravillosos en tu vida.
amoriosdelamoda.blogspot.com
I am really very sorry to hear about your experiences. You are such a strong person for coming out and sharing your story with us and I hope that you never have to go through anything like this ever again and that no girl does either.
x
Shloka
http://www.thesilksneaker.com
That is terrible what happened to you. I don’t know how someone can even do stuff like this and live with themselves, but some people are sick. I’m glad you’re putting this out here and spreading the awareness because it’s really not a topic that is talked about much. It’s awesome that you’re recovering and you’re a strong 30 years old. Keep spreading the positive vibes, and I wish you a happy birthday!
http://sugarcoatedbears.blogspot.com/
That is just awful thing to happen!Thanks for sharing!
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I’m so sorry to hear you are a victim. So many women are, and I think it is neat that people are speaking up to help with the isolation is causes. You look so lovely here.
Amy Ann
Straight A Style
What a beautiful post. Thank you for your strength and sharing with us all 🙁 x
http://www.stephyttravel.com
I believe one should be extremely bold to make a confess. That`s not something one should be ashamed of, but the feelings of a victim are shame, pain, that`s true. Maybe unfortunately I have never experienced something like this – I just can imagine the feelings of girls, not to feel myself. But I`ve noticed filthy looks at me. I feel such a pain reading stories about this. I believe no one has the right to abuse another. That shouldn`t exist in the world.
Keeping silence makes these abusers unpunished, although it`s so hard to confess, when you feel lonely with such an experience. But that`s good to know you`re not alone, not only with this experience. Thousands of people face something like you – they are afraid to try something new and they go to work they don`t like, they are afraid to lose people they love and to be lost. But what is more – hundreds of thousand love with all the heart and hope to get love, they make the world better just as they can, and finally they speak up, hoping they are not alone. And they are not.
I don`t much believe in secrets. I mean therecomes a day they become revealed. And life wiil never leave this just as it is. There comes a day of vengeance. That doesn`t mean revenge – but a boomerang or the law of balance. If you suffered you would be rewarded. If somebody abused he would get it back. I truly believe in this. And although these feelings bring pain and torment, I believe there comes a day of inner freedom.
Although these confessions unite the girls that experienced this, that`s good to know the world stands by you. It`s the feeling of universal compassion, support and hope. I feel admiration for your courage, inner strength, the power to inspire in the darkest times when you need support and comfort on your own. Please don`t let the inner light fade.
Happy birthday, Natali, and let this day become a starting point of new era with inner light, inspiration and love.
Que fotazaaaaas!! Me encanta el look completo!!!!
xx
Mónica Sors
MES VOYAGES À PARIS
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Heartbreaking but beautiful, thank you for sharing ❤️🌹🍎xxx
Natali my friend, that was a heart shattering thing to read. And I applaud you for your strength and resolve. Thank you for sharing your experience, and hopefully stories like this can help end abuse as we know it.
Oh, and hyvaa syntymapaivaa 🙂
Happy birthday! You are so brave for sharing your story and I’m so happy to see how strong it has made you! Also beautiful photos!
Absolutely stunning!! Beautiful photos. xoxoxo
http://www.toksblog.com
what a beautiful post! I agree with what you said – this has to stop. Amazing photo, btw. Happiest bday to you!
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You are so brave to be speaking out about this! It shouldn’t have to be bold for women to do so, but hopefully with more women speaking out about this, it will be the attackers who are ashamed and not the victims!
ZoeVogue
You are braver now. Inspirational and sad at the same time, these words have a lot of power. Gorgeous pictures 🙂
Xx
Lau
http://www.malibluemymind.com
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So sorry to hear your story, but you’ve been braver and stronger now <3
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